Fan Mail

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Fan Mail

Postby Wraili » Thu Apr 19, 2007 2:32 pm

Dear Billy,

What in the hell do you think you're doin'?

I learned that damned dance of yours all those years ago. I remember even convincing women it was sexy to have a bunch of people out there slappin' heels and struttin' like truckers. Your song was played at my cousin's weddin' reception too, right after the dollar dance and before the chicken dance. We learnt your dance, now you need to learn some dancin' too!

I swear, if you lose this one, I don't think I'll recover. A 13? For a cha-cha? 17 on the Rumba? Dammit! You're representing us, man!

And what is with all that, "I've had some of my most romantic nights in the back of a chevvy" stuff?!?!? That's just wrong! You know your momma was watchin', and so was your second cousin Ellen. We all remember when you and Ellen were caught in your daddy's chevvy behind the pole barn at that church picnic, but to bring it up on television? Shame on you!

Now put on that silk wife-beater, get out there, and win!
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